- abrigo

«se queres um escudo impenetrável, permanece dentro de ti mesmo»

Tuesday, February 25, 2014

no regrets

I can't believe in my life at this point. I changed everything, I changed so fast. I gain the capability of forgiving someone, of forgetting someone. At this moment It's just me at this computer, alone in this house, far away from my home town, far away from Portugal. I miss home, I miss my family, but I don't miss you, I don't and it's a very weird felling that sometimes makes me think. I was happy, but I feel different now, I feel that you don't belong with me, and Im not yours like I always said, I've never been. 
You're still in my thoughts sometimes at night or with some music that plays on the radio, but you're not stuck anymore. I moved on so quickly, I understood that you will never be fully mine, and I'm ok with it. I'm not yours either.
I'm able to laugh at you, to think at some moments that we had, I think about that. I see that we were happy together. I remember all the times that I said that if - I loose you, I would be the first person to say, come back - ; It's not going to happen, and going home makes me think that I'm going to see you for sure. The truth is I don't know if I want to see you after all the pain that you caused me. Otherwise I want to see you, I want to say - Hello - I want to show you that we are both OK with being without each others. I grow up so much in this 6 months that I can't believe it. I'm a better person now, and happier. Everyone tells me that, you look great, you look so pretty, canada is doing wonders for you! It is! I feel better, I feel that I'm home. I feel that I meant to be here and forget the rest. I feel that my destiny was this. And my past is exactly that, my  past. That's were you are. Smiling for me like the last time you kissed me.  I keep those moments with a lot of affection, but, I don't forget what you said, and what you didn't do. 
Now, let's just do the stupid assignment! 

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